Having grown up in rural Vermont I have heard of “feminine wiles” from the romance books that almost every young girl reads….but, come on. Does a woman have to do that in real life? I never had to before….there was always a guy in my life and I don’t remember having to do anything that sounded like this “game” that I hear from all the professionals. Like, don’t tell too much about yourself on the first date. Make the date a short date so he is left wanting more. Seem mysterious, come on girls this is kinda funny!

Okay, so I have been dating for the last two years and not really finding anyone that I wanted to keep around for more than a few weeks, and the other way around (frown). So I asked a male friend jokingly what the heck I was doing wrong! And he told me first that what he was about to reveal could possibly lose him his “male” card.  They are not allowed to share secrets with the enemy. LOL! So he asked me if I held sex as the trump card? WHAT?

Okay, I have heard of this but had only heard of using it in a marriage….not is a dating situation. Yes, we all know that if you sleep with them too early they think you are a tramp and don’t call back….I get it…but what if you do wait? Then what? He said to use the sex to get what I wanted and that most men were used to that from women! So give them what they are used to and they come around. Wow!

So, I tried it. I have been seeing a man off and on for about 4 months. Really kind and wonderful man, but a little damaged.  He was VERY straightforward about NOT wanting a relationship. He just started to call when it was convenient for him…not a good start. But, I followed my male friends advice and told him that ‘IF HE WASN’T MAKING ME HAPPY OUTSIDE THE BED THEN HE WASN’T GETTING IN THE BED”. The look on his face was priceless. But, you know what? IT WORKS! We are starting to do more together and he is more attentive! Now I am the one hoping to find him near a bed! Damn my 40 year old hormones!

So I guess whatever works….I will keep you informed on how it goes.